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are some things I have in my house that are pointless but brilliant:
Homer held hostage by a teddy bear disguised
as a plumber
Some pictures we took of New York where
it was really cold
Two goldfish
A rubber shark and some heroic limescale
Novels and movies
Some Star Wars lego that I did; note
the posed legs on the big one
A game called Made in Wario
Made in Wario* is a collection of many tiny
little games, loads of them. Game ants almost. When I say tiny
I mean that to call these 'mini games' would be to over-claim
their depth. A game might consist of nothing more than cutting
a steak by hitting left-then-right once. Or it could be helping
a beautiful anime girl to sniff-up a bogey by pressing 'A' five
times. Indeed my favorite is set in a car; you press 'A' when
you hear screetching brakes, you do this so that an airbag deploys
to save a crash-test dummy. You have no more involvement than
pressing the button once.
Like all the things in the list above; Made
in Wario is utterly pointless but completely wonderful. You achieve
nothing and you are supposed to achieve nothing. The mini-game
Jump Forever is about jumping forever and nothing less. Surrounded
by so much pointless endeavour serves to focus you on scores and
nothing else. You have to, have to, have to beat your highscores.
You have to, have to, have to, take 'one more go'. It is the purest
videogaming I have ever played, and it is fucking hilarious.
Honestly, its great. I've played some of those
little games hundreds of times now and I still want to play them
some more. Play Made in Wario for 30 seconds or two hours; both
options work just fine. Its not just thrown together either, all
the character stuff, the sound, the visual ticks and tricks; they
all work together to make the thing fun.
If you love video games, and I mean love the
spirit of electronic play, then you have to get yourself a copy
of Made in Wario. It is gaming come home.
*Made in Wario is already available in
the Europe and the US where its called Wario Ware - I liked the
Japanese box art, I'm a nerd okay? It works fine, there is nothing
you can't do even if you don't speak Japanese.
...and finally
Me and Jimaroid (with the SP) playing
Wario Ware down the pub last Saturday. We were going to stage
a happy photo but didn't need to. These are genuine hung-over
gaming giggles
But then Jimaroid became convinced that
the ice in his glass had melted into the exact shape of a 'cock
and balls'. Oh yeah, umm get Made in Wario; it's ace
RODENT CASH RATING -
£30
 "you'll
be extendin yer dumps te play"
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