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Last week, in preparation for the release
of Ratchet & Clank 2, I completed the original Ratchet and
Clank for the third time. Doing so left me ready for more of the
bolt grabbing, enemy blasting, robot zapping, and random vandalising
that had won my heart first-time around.
I was eager and I wasn’t disappointed.
The weapons are tougher, Ratchet is stronger, enemies are harder
to kill, bolts are easier to acquire (but everything’s more
expensive – that’s inflation for ya!), weapons upgrades
(automatic with prolonged use) are sweet, and game play is as
smooth as Bailey’s after a blow-job.
Ratchet ponders a nut-and-bolt type arrangement.
Nice day.
Up until now, I wouldn’t have called myself
a ‘gamer’ as such, but this little gem of a videogame
has already managed to keep my normally limited attention span
locked-on, for over 30 hours in just one week. When I close my
eyes, I see little green targeting circles. Every now-and-then,
I swear that I hear the clankity clank of bolts being picked up.
I only wish I had a thruster-pack to help me get up the stairs
after a heavy session.
In the game-world there is a googolplex of planets
– full of enemies who increase in strength as you go along.
These require loads more atomic-bomb/pulse-rifle/spider-bot/etc-ammo,
before their innards are finally blasted to bits and vanish –
leaving the scenery pristine and you with more bolts in your pocket.
There’s a new black market now, where
you can exchange bolts platinum (yes, that’s one up from
golden) for weapon enhancements - like the boiling acid mod, the
lightning mod, or auto lock-on. As you progress, your nano-tech
levels increase (that’s your health really), your weapons
upgrade, and there’s a handy body-armour enhancing vendor
to be found as well. For those of you who like to wade in and
unleash mayhem - there’s plenty of close-up weaponry to
choose from. Or if you prefer to pick-off your enemies from a
distance, there’s a similar amount of weapons choice in
available. So, what kinda mood are you in?
”Comedy robot backpack,
eh? On your knees, sonny…”.
Personally, I like to pick and mix, but I must
admit a slight preference to the electrocuting, auto-lock on:
Golden Chopper. Although taking-out all the enemies without taking
a single hit in the Gladiator Games, with nothing more than the
upgraded wrench is pretty special too.
Sure, there’s a story to follow, but on
top of that - there’s secrets to uncover, bits where you
end up yelling “arse!”, skill-points to be earned,
space battles to be fought, and a galaxy of planets to play on.
It’s sweet. It appeals to my blood lust and satisfies my
cuteness requirement at the same time.
Annoyingly difficult in places, and swimmingly
easy when you back track, Ratchet & Clank 2 is (atm –
I’m a girl, remember?) everything I want from a game. It’s
fucking pretty, it handles like a dream, there’s plenty
of mayhem, and there is a mad host of weaponry to choose from.
You can instantly forgive the characters’ cringe-worthy
gullibility, and the annoying occasional camera upset, when you
find the SHEEPINATOR! This is the magnificent (if slightly slow)
weapon that turns your enemies into lovely fluffy sheepies! What
more could you ask for?
Right, I know it’s short and sweet, but
I’ve got a Giant Mutated Protopet to go and defeat…
Wish me luck! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaarrrr!
bluey, December
2003.
RODENT CASH RATING -
A big old bag of bolts, or £31.
 "One
for the ladieeeees!"
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The official
R&C site. A lot of fun as it goes.
Not entirely sure what’s going on here
but I know I like it!
R&C Hawaii
tour.
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