Is Christmas on it’s way, or have I just spunked a huge wad of cash buying presents for relatives for my health? No, it’s the beginning of the gradual ramp-up to the all new, thanks to Halo 2, Microsoft sponsored ‘Xbox-Mas.’
In some ways, the build up to Christmas is better than the actual event, like looking forward to watching Eastenders is becoming logarithmically more enjoyable than enduring the tortuous misery-fest itself..
Luckily, there is a legacy from our youth that rises back to consciousness at this time of year: taking it ‘easier’ at work. In a way, it’s the education system’s fault. If, at Christmas, they hadn’t have let us bring to school our Game and Watches, Kerplunk and indeed Mastermind, we wouldn’t have this undeniable urge to seasonally slack off, like bears feeling the urge to hibernate.
This week, we asked you to submit some game box-art tinkerings on the theme of ‘Skiving’, so take two hours for lunch, abuse your flexi time and join in our celebration of laziness, irresponsibility and half-arsed half-baked attitudes to work.
Anders
Gold. To quote Anders in his press release – ‘ A product for those gaming sessions where you just can't afford to take a piss break...’ This man is clearly a legend and must be put to work on the new Nintendo DS Bio-Feedback game, ‘NintenDumpS’.
Dio
Silver. Let it all out, Dio my man. The tears, the fury, the frustration of lazy Post Office staff have pushed him too far. I suggest next time it happens, try a special delivery of a crowbar to the face. Get the buggers to sign for THAT.
Baboonanza
Bronze. Baboonanza pops his Image of the Week cherry, and finds himself getting a medal! No time for winners circle jerking however, the Tea is getting cold, and we’ve just got to pop down to the trade centre to get a part we need.
Scrabbling at the feet of our winners for a taste of the sweet glory are the runners up. All of them splendid, but most importantly, almost certainly conceived and made during work time! Let’s take a look, shall we?
Baboonanza
Or more accurately a ‘Pissy’ or a ‘Shaggy’ depending on what you were doing last night.
Russ
It’s good to warm up with a nice game of Dun FuckAll.
Russ
There’s no point reasoning with ‘em, Russ. Hobbits are lazy sods, and that’s the way it is… HUH!
DK Tronics
Even in the future, Sport is the same. Riddled with Hedonistic lazy cunts whose only responsibilities are to turn up to matches and drug tests, but often fail to do either.
Zen Chan
Everyone has time to have a quick kip under the ol’ desk. It’s warm, it’s dark, and there is a montage of crisps on the floor from previous hasty lunch breaks just waiting to be sampled.
BetaKarraTene
Probotector in the ‘States, Contra everywhere else, and a complete fucking sham on the part of the apathetic Alien conquerors. Aren’t they polite though?
BetaKarraTene
Fresh from it’s addition to our front page from last issue, so good we’ve printed it twice! Shame she’s only got her elbow on that copier though.
PaulEMoz
Some of us take skiving to a whole new level by freeloading off the state. I ask this question though of social scroungers and professional slackers; what would be easier? Working your nuts off looking after 13 kids or just getting a decent job that you can have a little doze in. Quality of life, baby. That’s what matters.
swith
Some of the Graffiti in the toilets where I work is unrepeatable. Absolutely vile. I should know, I wrote most of it.
Lethargy
The aptly monikered Lethargy offers us this image to go in our graphical soup de jour. The last high profile Industrial Action I can remember was the fire-fighters strike. The cause of the strike escapes me now, but I seem to recall they wanted new ping-pong rackets or something..
Orava
I heard that Simon Cowell played that most demanding of instruments ‘the triangle’ on much of the music from the groups he’s pimped in the past so as to get a little extra royalties. 4 letters, starts with ‘C’.
PVB
When someone doesn’t even have to work for a living, you expect them to do something decent with their time. Not this trollop to the rich and gormless. I reckon Ms.Hilton with no make-up would look the spit of Sonia off Eastenders, personally.
Beta Karra Tene
My neighbour doesn’t work, he stays at home knocking things into walls with his hammer. Bang, bang, bang. I peered in to his window the other day – bloody commemorative plates all over his wall. To top things off, he’s named his house ‘ Nashville’ and has a confederate flag above the door. He’s from Leicester.
Orava
Mario plans to take a nice two hour lunchbreak, clocking out as he comes back in, then running downstairs after a half hour, clocking back in. 2 hours for the price of a half hour! Admirable.
To see the pictures in their natural habitat, you can take a wander through here:
http://forum.wayoftherodent.com/viewtopic.php?t=1283
Or here…
http://www.yakyak.org/viewtopic.php?t=27618
SWITH, November 2004.
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