| I got
this from a "source" earlier today - interesting reading
I'm sure you'll agree...
To: Management
From: Development
Subject: Design docs for "Super Flying Bomber Man"
---------------------------
Dave,
Here's that info you asked for about our new
game concept!
We're very excited down here; the first builds
of the engine are a real blast. Feel free to come down from your
tower any time to see how it plays! I’d just like to say
now that the team and I have put heart and soul into this. We
are really proud of the early results and chuffed to think that
this one might soon become a reality. It will be a triumph for
the team and a delight for the game players out there. Thank you
for your support.
Cheers,
Bob
Game Name: Super
Flying Bomber Man (Title subject to revision)
Genre: 2D Platform/Arcade
Synopsis:
Aliens have planted bombs in six of Earth's cities and it's up
to you as "Super Flying Bomber Man" to stop them.
Fly from city to city diffusing the bombs before
the time runs out.
Gameplay Details:
Each level will be themed around an easily recognisable place
(The Pyramids, London, New York etc). You fly around the level
and have to collect the bombs while avoiding the aliens which
warp in through the level. You'll get bonus points for collecting
the bombs in sequence as well as from the occasional bonus pills
that appear periodically.
When you collect all the bombs you progress
to the next, harder, screen.
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: "Super Flying Bomber Man"?
---------------------------
Bob
Ahh Bob, we’re really stoked on this one.
Excellent news. I’ll get back to you when we’ve run
the concept and demo through the usual stages. Just paperwork
you understand but important all the same.
Dave
=======================================
To: Marketing
From: Management
Subject: "Super Flying Bomber Man"?
---------------------------
Charles,
Have we had the market testing results for this
back yet?
Dave
=======================================
To: Management
From: Marketing
Subject: "Super Flying Bomber Man"?
---------------------------
Dave,
Hey man! Great party last night! Great teambuilding,
especially with that blodne! And put me in touch with your "sweetie
supplier" sometime would you?
Super Flyngi Bomber Man? Is that the new thing
those social misfits over in dev have been raving about? Fuck,
you want me to actually play it? Have you gone mental or u still
in comedown?
That sekky of mine, wasshername?, Mandy. She
wants to get in my good books, she can be ‘Sukky Fluffing
Bummer Guy’ for half hour. In her fucking lunchbreak tho.
I'll get her to do it.
Chaz
=======================================
To: Management
From: Marketing
Subject: "Super Flying Bomber Man"?
---------------------------
Well, she certainly played alright! hahahaa - you know what I
mean! She quit though. If a chick don’t want her ass touching
she shouldn’t come to fuckin’ work in clothes.
Anyhoo - back on target - we sent a couple of
the plebs out and the resuls are a bit hit and miss. Our essential
traget, as we've discussed before, are the high-income/low-self-esteem
C1 audience and our research suggests that; while they like the
idea of combating terrorism, the "alien" thing is a
bit "passé". A move to a more realistic setting
would help sell the game to our core suckers.
Chaz
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: Some suggestions!
---------------------------
Bob
We really love what you guys are doing down
there! This game is going to be absolutely massive!
We just have one or two tiny suggestions to
throw into the mix if we can? A couple of tweaks if you’ll
indulge.
Marketing have suggested that the science fiction
setting has been overdone, moving the game to a much more realistic
(especially in these post 9-11 days haha) anti-terrorism setting
will improve market penetration by as much as 34.7%! (I know how
you boys just love your numbers and all that)
Obviously, if we're going to make the setting
more realistic then the main character should be too - I'm sure
I've never seen a little man in a blue cape flying around London.
Except that one time we all went over there on that awesome team-building
trip, man that was special. Remember, remember London? Oh no,
of course you guys couldn’t make it in the end could you.
How’d that deadline go anyway?
Dave
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: "Super Flying Bomber Man" no longer!
---------------------------
Bob
One more thing!
The publishers have been on the line, and I
think you're going to be very pleased with this! Apparently they've
secured the rights to the next Will Smith Summer Blockbuster!!!!!
And they think that *your* game is going to be a perfect tie in
to "Love Boat IV – This time it’s Hetro"
Their people are flying over next week to discuss
the content changes – nothing drastic, just a team effort
to ensure consistency. This is a huge opportunity for us Kevin.
Remember, it’s your game and we are all on the same team
here. The Love Boat IV winning team!
Dave
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: Love Boat IV – This time it’s Hetro
---------------------------
Bob,
I do feel that you were a little negative in
that meeting? Surely telling Love Boat’s people to go and,
if I recall correctly, "Fuck themselves with a monkey"
wasn't the best way to react to what were, after all, only very
minor changes to the design. I do accept though that sexual relations
with monkeys could indeed feature in the finished game but only
if we went down the R-Rated route and nobody wants to fish with
that pole.
Still, I know that you "creative types"
can be a little temperamental and I did manage to smooth things
over with them. Perhaps you need a little break? It could be the
stress - I know that without my five weeks in Antigua every year
I'd be a gibbering wreck lol
Dave
=======================================
To: Management
From: Development
Subject: Love Boat IV – This time it’s Hetro
---------------------------
Dave
Go fuck yourself with a monkey.
Bob
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: Love Boat IV – This time it’s Hetro
---------------------------
Hoe kay.
There was one other thing Bob, after you left
the meeting, the publishers suggested that we change the game
to a 3D environment. 3D is so much easier to sell don't you agree?
It’s the future, 2D is for communists and we all know what
happened to them don’t we Bob? They lost Bob, that’s
what happened to 2D communists.
So 3D it is! I'm sure that it won't take you
more than a day or so. Good chap!
Dave
=======================================
To: Development
From: Art
Subject: Love Boat IV – This time it’s Hetro
---------------------------
Bob, Ther e is just no way that we canpossibly get the artwork
for sixd fferent worlds finished before the end of project! I've
been talking to Dave and he agrees that we'll ship with one world
(But we'll make it a great looking one) and then do the others
in the xpansion packs!
Why don’t you come to Moe’s anymore
Bob? Why?
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: Love Boat - The Launch!
---------------------------
Bob!
Well, it's been a long hard six months for all
of us, but I think that you'll agree that the effort has been
more than worth it!
We really feel that the mix of First Person
Shooting and Stealth Action that you boys have come up with will
really make the game stand out from the competition! We trusted
you and you came good well done chap!
Dave
=======================================
To: Development
From: Management
Subject: Love Boat - First reviews
---------------------------
Bob,
Well Bob, I'm disappointed in you to be honest.
We thought you really cared about this project.
"Like Splinter Cell - But Crap! 20%"
- and that was the kindest thing that anyone had to say about
it.
We believed in you Bob, we were, I think you'll
agree, 110% behind you all the way through this project and you
have let us down badly.
You're fired.
Do not steal computers when you leave. We have
your home address.
Dave.
=======================================
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