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Why I Love...
Bonus Stage
 
 

That’s Just Wrong
You do not know what you think you know.

The Missile Command Bug
Part 4. The return.

Blazing Glory
Lead pumping therapy.

The Grey Man
How Kinnock started the fall.

I Just Had to Look Away…
Arcade growing pains.

Wipeout Pure (PSP)
Zone racing perfection.

Lego Star Wars (Xbox)
Nothing is as good as other things.

Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition (PS2)
Need for less speed.

Electroplankton (DS)
Wibble, wobble, puff, laaaaa.

Full Spectrum Warrior (Xbox)
Time two zero.

Grand Prix (PC)
Slipping up inside Berger.

The Billy Hague Election Diaries.
Seal-up the Billy Ballot!

Image Of The Month
Election Special!
 

 

TT
"'Cobs' are served in the canteen here. By a large Derby Lass who says "Alright me Duck, what can I get you?". Lovely. Makes me feel good to be alive."

 
 

 

Sickboy
On John Virgo's novelty caberet act: "I concur. It was an exquisite delight - the Yorkshire Ripper atoning for all that hammer murder what he done by being adequately well observed about snooker players' mannerisms."

 
 

 

Anon.
"I once sat on a bench on the south bank of the Thames near Waterloo and watched the sun setting over the river. I was sitting with a woman who loved the Kinks, and for whom Waterloo Sunset was a favourite song. It was towards the end of our relationship, and we both knew it, and we held hands and didn't say anything, but just sat and were happy in a melancholy kind of way. It was perfect. London has never been as beautiful to me as it was at that moment.

She and I don't speak much any more. The odd email now and again, every year or so, you know how it is..."
 

We present Rodent's world famous bid to list the top 5 of everything in the world.
Rodent's
Top 5 elections (winner).

2000 Romsey Bi-election (Liblabcon Pact)

2004 US Presidential Election (Al Gore)
1945 UK General Election (not Churchill)
2005 Papal Election (Palpatine I)
2003 Coco-Vote ('Coco Pops')
 
 
 


Title: Kennedy Approach
Genre: Chat Simulator
Publisher: D.K.Tronics
Description: Approach Mr Approachable himself Charles 'Kendal Mint Cake' Kennedy. Difficulty levels ramp up as the Ginger Lord's right elbow swings-in the single malt. Later obstacles incude a innovative and tricky avoid-the-nappies round. The final boss level sees you attempt to storm the set of Have I got News For You so as to plant a deep smacker on the cheek of our beaming carrot-topped leader of men. Also women.
Rating: Open and Welcoming.

 
 

 

Complete set of back issues here

 

Election Special!
Plucky third place calls. Rejoice!

Stop Press! Final results now in for the General Election. And what a lot of suprises there are:

- Plucky Lib Dem Gamecube: 34%
- New Labour Terminator PS2: 27%
- Green WonderSwan: Twelve and a half
- Respect PSP: 15%
- Conservative Xbox: 4m%
- Undecided DS: Greater-than-PSP%
- UKIP Jonny Forigener Dreamcast: 6%
- Old Labour Nintendo Entertainment System: 2%
- Raving Loony Gizmondo: Dani-Minogue%
- Abstain Amstrad GSX4000: 0%
- Veritas Virtual Boy: 0%
- BNP Jaguar: 0%

Which shows a swing of 44% to more having a laugh playing vidjo games.

Ace.

So, are we all still up then? What's happing? We've already seen Liam Fox (UK Conservative MP) framed in front of a massive projector screen showing the Katamari Damancy rainbow field wallpaper - yes indeed, this is truely the gamers' election.

And get yerself down there to this month's Image compo - oh look it's lots of respectful coverage of them nice political people. Frankly, some of these images should be used to teach school kids about British Politics - they'll make more sense than all the 'news' coverage of the last British month.

Also in our Bonus Stage we have had exclusive access to the astonishing diaries of William Hague. Shocking revelations and orange pop.

Super.

Oh and there's a bunch of shit about gaming in here this month too - put your feet up, get the teletext results service on and have a proper read of Rodent - what a night!

Cheers and happy anti-climax.

Koworld, Publisher - May 2005