STOP PRESS** Please scroll down for excellent hastily added 'EA are less than perfect employers' joke... (after Sickboy's sign-off)
The sun rising…
“Destroy him, my pretties!”
Mount Fuji, pointy trains, people employed to shove too many people onto pointy trains, geisha, sushi, fugu, bukkake, karate, karaoke,hentai, samurai, sumo, Ryu, Shenmue, earthquakes, bombs, Hiroshima, Akira, Nagasaki, Kendo Nagasaki (the wrestler), Sonic, Mario, Sega, Nintendo, Hello Kitty, J-Pop, cherry blossom, Battle Royale, schoolgirls in hats, nice and tidy ornate gardens, sliding paper doors, Hokusai’s Great Wave, small cars, neon, noodles, Elvis impersonators, baseball, love hotels, “Just when I think I’m winning”, nasty vending machines, women tied up in knots, little jingles that tell you it’s time to cross the road, massive big fucking robots, massive big fucking demons, massive big fucking robot demons, Godzilla, Clive James laughing at Endurance and, umm, little rabbits.
All things Japanese this week, lovies. No special occasion, like. You know your games, so you know why. Read. And bow, frequently.
Here be this week’s Novel TV-Play Etherealness…
Playing Japanese. Kicking arse in Tokyo. Or… not. AEROFLOTT
Buying Japanese. The magical shop of spuddy wonder. MATT
Learning Japanese. We really think so you do. HYPHZ
Importing Japanese. Forbidden games from afar. MAYHEM
Reading About Japanese. A book review. JIMAROID
Those Crazy Japanese. They did Super Monkey Ball.
Xbox Boy. Go, go, Xbox Boy! KOWORLD
Visiting Japanese. Go, go, Mr. Robototron! JIMAROID
“Thank you, sir. Now, KNEEL BEFORE ME!”
Gotta rush. Plane to catch. Honest.
Grudging thanks to you-know-who-although-we-wish-we-didn’t, as ever. Specialsuper thanks to MATT, for the photos and ELY for extra-ace picture-search skillageness. We kiss you.
Now enough with the fucking fireworks.
, Editor, November 14th 2004
oooh, oooh - a WotR satirical and bang-up-to-date gag (by ):
(Don't worry - we haven't sold out...)
Because this issue has 'so much in it' WotR will be back in two weeks time, hope that's okay? Here's what some of the Rodents will be doing with the week off:
- Halo 2
, , and will be playing
- will be being strip-searched at Washington Dulles International Airport
- will be attempting to tear-up his post election residency visa
- will be putting off all work to feed his Star Wars Battlefront addiction
- will be tearing out his hair trying to get Koworld's stupid fucking wireless bridge to talk to Koworld's stupid fucking Xbox so Koworld can play stupid fucking Live games
- will also be wondering where his original Xbox controller has gone
- will still be attempting to flush out the effects of his Mexican cow-pat mushroom holiday... with Mexcal
- will be embarking on a glorious new career
- mysterious reviewing head will be spending quality time with Ava
- And all other Rodents and guests will be enjoying a break from us nagging them for articles - cheers then!
selected previous issues :
Way of the Rodent and Smart Circle
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