viral…
Sorry we’re late. Again. But someone, somewhere did not want you to read this week’s issue. We won’t bore you with the details…
Oh, go on then. The Ed’s computer had this virus, see, and it wouldn’t start up properly and then, when he finally made it start up… THE ONLY FILES THAT WERE CORRUPT WERE THE RODENT PAGES.
Seriously. Everything else was fine. Yeahyeah, it was the last thing he ‘saved’ before a crash so that might explain it, but still – spooky, eh? Well…
Still here, though. They tried to stop us, those cleverclever cuntishly cuntish virus writing cuntaroonies. But they FAILED. Hahaha. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.
Haha.
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Top gits, this weekend…
Huzzahs all round, ‘cos we’re welcoming a mysteriously absent Rodent back into our open, non-gay arms. Yes. Themeadows is here again, with a slushy-sweet piece on cats, chisels and tellies.
Otherwhere, there’s a cracking debut piece by SolidChris, that explains why it is that most of us ordinary chaps don't play FPS online.
There be also a Red Dead Revolver review, a Lords Of Midnight Why I Love…, and, by quite truthfully popular demand, another wave of Paper Arcade cabs.
Go fold.
Editor sleep, now.
scratch…
Get it while it’s psychoactive. Original Videogaming Spirit Cake…
He’s back. We were worried. ‘sokay. He moved house. THEMEADOWS
SOLIDCHRIS makes a solid debut (hahahah) online.
DIO shows frightening dedication to Lords Of Midnight.
Red Dead Revolver – ruthlessly assessed by PAULEMOZ
PAPER ARCADE – Wave 2. FUSEBALL and friends keep ‘em coming.

Cartoon by DavidH.
Atari? Driv3r? 2.5m units shipped? Every one of those aborted fuckers is coming back to you. Every last one. The Real Atari shot themselves in the foot time-after-time (ET anyone?) back in the day, and now Le Faux Atari have done the same - for the want of a few more months this game might have playably alright but what's actually hit the shops is gobsmackingly awful. Well played chaps, hope you're proud of yourselves: I mean christ, we're only the punters after all - feel free to fuck us right up our gullible bottoms, after all we should be more careful - caveat emptor and all that. Those of us who were prepared to give Infogrammes the benefit of the doubt in their transition to Atari have been proved to be fools. Thanks then.
STOP PRESS: Would the cunt trying to sell print-outs of Paper Arcade models on eBay, please fucking stop. We've reported you to eBay and will make ghost bids from fake accounts if either you or eBay fail to withdraw the auction. There's always one bastard who wants to spoil things for the rest isn't there?
Next Week… Why a man called Bruno Marcos deserves some of your money… Yes, we know we did that last week. But this time we really really promise.

RODENT,
June 25th 2004
selected previous issues :










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