"I'm not going to play my favourite game again,
because if I did it would alter my recollection. I
can't go back and I can never re-create what this
game meant to me.” JIMAROID
Crazy Taxi.
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freeze…
Welcome, once-a-freakin’-gain to your
weekly jack-up of videogame news, views and misguided abuse –
all beamed live from our underground, Teletubbies-like infracomplex
here in a particularly pleasant part of rural Hertfordshire.
This week, a triumphant return for two grizzled
old regular Rodents – Jimaroid and TheMeadows – one
with a touching tale of how games can forge long-standing friendships,
the other with a touch-himself rant about how sports-sims are
rubbish.
In other news, the ever-prolific Yank-exiled
Geordie, PaulEMoz, delivers a magical story of one of those spontaneous
childhood moments that still stir the soul twenty-odd years down
the line, TMUK gets his frequent pub-to-home woes off his raging
tits with a babble known as ‘Crazy MiniCab’ for the
‘Bonus Stage’ (formely Games Design 101) section,
and Fuseball swoons over an instant Xbox classic.
Yes. We said ‘Xbox’ and we said
‘classic’ in the same sentence.
Only joking.
Or are we?
rock…
Another week, another cirrhosis-mocking vat
of original videogaming spirit…
An RPG friend in need is a source of ace tips. JIMAROID
The shitness of sports sims – Aussie style. Multi-cultured,
us. THEMEADOWS
Why you should always take an interest in your dad’s work.
PAULEMOZ
There. That didn’t hurt, did it? Be good,
now. And if you can’t be good, just… embrace Satan
as your one true Lord or something.
Oh, and please – if only for the sake
of the children – write something for us. Head over to the
newly poshed-up forum
zone to find out how.
Oh, and great news – we’ve been
banned in China. Presumably for the swearing and the infrequent,
puerile references to bodily functions. Oh, and the fact that
our all-time favourite film is Richard Gere’s Red Corner
(tagline – ‘Severity for those who resist…’).
Power to the people, indeed.
Now, get some exercise.
Next Week:
We absolutely promise to get round to Deus Ex 2. Probably.
The original rodent,
March 12th 2004
top ten…
Ways to Annoy an Internet Fanboy,
byRODENTIA
10. Tell them Half Life is shit because of the
lift bug.
9. Claim that Carmack hasn't written a good game since Romero
left.
8. Say 'Halo is rubbish because you can't even have three guns.'
7. Form complete sentences, utilising correct spelling and grammar.
6. Suggest that Bill Gates isn't actually Satan.
5. Tell them 'You are good at computer games and all that that
implies.'
4. Say 'David Beckham Soccer shits all over Winning Eleven 7.'
3. Say 'I'm sure it is a great
console but I just prefer the colour of the other one.'
2. Forget to put 'san' after Shigero Miyamoto's name.
1. Use an undisputable fact in a discussion.
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Limited accept no responsibility for the content of the related
forum or for the content of articles, written by third-parties,
re-published on this site. Writers' opinions are their own and
do not reflect those of the owners of WotR or of Smart Circle
Limited. WotR and Smart Circle Limited disclaim all liability
for such content to the fullest extent permitted by law.
